Christopher

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It’s probably time that I introduce you to my husband.

 

If you’ve had a wedding with me, you have probably already met him. He’s often my second shooter and he does a fantastic job. I would make him a permanent part of my business if he wasn’t already very much employed and going to law school at night. More on that later.

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I want to say… that I don’t know how to really write this post at all. This is my husband. He is literally my most favorite person. Writing a blog post about him seems like an impossible task – where do I start? How do I even begin to begin? My mind is suddenly so full of things to say that I’m just sitting here speechless.

I’ll start by saying this: Chris is a very private person. It’s something I really love about him but I know for sure that this post (which he knows is happening) is making him anxious. I wrote down a couple of survey questions to ask him after dinner, the answers of which I would share here – and with each question I watched him descend slowly into madness, more and more. He laughed like a crazy man, pulled at his hair, put his whole face into his hands, and asked me to clarify the most basic things so that he could be sure he was answering them correctly. Chris is not a public sharer. He’d rather not have a Facebook, he doesn’t post statuses or tweets or personal pictures online, and he will never volunteer to be the center of attention.

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This makes him seem so serious, right?

So now is where I tell you that my husband is anything but.

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Chris is goofy. He is so, so goofy, often to a fault. He’s funny, he’s extremely friendly, he loves people, he loves to talk, and he approaches life with a certain stillness that I aspire toward. He has an infectious laugh that I love. He loves comedy and he loves to tell jokes – especially punny jokes. He gets that from his dad.

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I met Chris in third grade. I was a stringy, very quiet, athletic girl back then and he was a short, pudgy, goofball of a kid. I actually remember the first time he talked to me. It involved a microwave and it was very odd. If you ever hang out with me, just ask and I will tell you the story. It requires certain voices and facial expressions and isn’t a good enough story without them.

We remained friends from third grade until high school graduation. He developed a crush on me in 10th grade and I tried my best to ignore it for about three years. The problem was, though, that I couldn’t. By the time we were 18 the thought of not having Chris in my daily life made me feel ill, sick-to-my-stomach ill, cry-myself-to-sleep ill. Those feelings were rough to work through. I didn’t understand them, I didn’t want to admit they were there because they terrified me. Chris was on his way out of my life forever. And then, the night we graduated high school, I decided not to be an idiot.

The rest is history, I suppose.

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But listen, this isn’t about us. This is about him.

Here is my husband, in his own words, more or less:

Name: Christopher Michael Thomas (He has two middle names! So do I :D )

Nicknames: Everyone calls him Chris. I sometimes call him Christopher. I very often call him Cub or Cubbie. There’s a story behind that. I forget it, though.

Zodiac: Pisces (like me :D)

Job: Patent examiner for the USPTO

Studying: Patent law at UMD Law – he has 2.5 years left to go

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Interests: Movies, music, gadgets, politics, science, guitar

Music of choice: Pink Floyd, Minus the Bear, Bob Seger, Lupe, the Beatles (he told me not to put the Beatles down because it’s too common an answer, but Chris has every song memorized and listens to them regularly. I’m putting it down.)

TV shows: The Wire (he’s watched it the whole way through at least seven times), 30 Rock, Game of Thrones

Movies: The Dark Knight, The Goonies, Indiana Jones: the Last Crusade, Jurrassic Park (Me: “The first one?” Chris: “The only one.”)

Sport: to play – Ultimate Frisbee. to watch – UMD basketball

Podcast: Comedy Bang Bang

Beverages: Root beer, IPAs, Ciders

Meals: Fish and Chips, hot dogs, pizza

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If you had the time and money to go anywhere tomorrow, where would you go?

Chris: Mars
Me: Be serious.
Chris: I’m serious. Mars.
Me: Okay, but you can’t actually –
Chris: Did you know they found water, Hannah?
Me: Didn’t they find that out a while ago?
Chris: Liquid water. They just announced it today. They found l i q u i d water.
Me: Awesome.
Chris: Liquid water! We could go there now and drink it! We might die, but still.
Me: Ok, but seriously, if you could go anywhere on EARTH, where would you go.
Chris: I want to go to Mars.
Me: On Earth, Chris.
Chris: With whose money?
Me: Not yours. Your bank account will not be affected.
Chris: Ok good. Do I have to leave right now?
Me: Now, tomorrow, next week – whenever you want!
Chris:::::groans loudly:::::
Me: Just answer, c’mon
Chris: Back to Paris
Me: Me too.  :)

What does your perfect day look like?

A bike ride through the woods, a walk around a lake, a nap on the beach, and dinner by a campfire with my wife.

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Say something in German: Ausgezeichnet!

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A couple other Chris facts:

  • His guitar is probably his favorite possession.
  • He loves to sing but won’t do it on camera.
  • He loves and cares for our dog so much that I melt.

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  • He is incredibly patient.

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  • Nothing is more important to him than his family.

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  • He is wonderful.

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Comments

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  1. Brae Kaufman says

    Nailed it, Hannah! This is probably the best thing I have ever read. What an amazing wife you are to honor your husband in this way. Most people do not get to be celebrated in such a tremendous way until after they are gone. I know he will always treasure this..I would. I laughed, I cried. That’s all you need. The dialogue between you two was classic Chris, I loved it!

    • admin says

      Wasn’t that dialogue so Chris?! I included it because I felt like it better explained him than anything else lol. Thanks, Brae! He is still pretty anxious about this post but is really glad it’s getting positive reactions :)